I went to University today. It wasn't so bad. I got a really good park straight away. My good luck continued as not one, not two but three of my lecturers turned out to speak English as their first language. Also I could be in for a bit of extra cash this semester because apparently the videotapes of Databasing lectures are pretty hard to get hold of in the library so I must start bringing a handicam into lectures and selling bootlegs. Unfortunately my main mission for today's uni excursion was an utter failure. I was not able to set my tute times for any of the three subjects I had today because the lecturers all failed to have the tute time organising system things running ahead of time (I've since done one). If I can get the other two subjects done perfectly, I will have an extremely kick arse timetable that reads like this:

Monday: 3pm - 5pm
Tuesday: 11am - 5pm
Thursday: 12am - 5pm

And that's it. No gaps whatsoever. Two days off per week. 11am start is a little early though...
I can't really use my hill joke, because I didn't walk up nor down the hill today. In fact, because of my timetable, I won't need to walk up or down that hill all semester. This is partly because all my stuff is in the same building at the top of the hill next to a nice car park, but still.
I've got to pay my union fees by next Wednesday. I hate union fees. $177 for what, nothing! I'm making it my mission to steal 177 free condoms from the union building to cover the cost of union fees.
Anyway this term is over in six weeeks, so that's what I'll be journaling. I figured seeing I'm writing jokes and shit about being at uni, I probably should start writing down the semi amusing thoughts and events that happen at uni so I have material to work with, which is why that's number one on my things to do this Autumnish period.

Things to do this Autumnish Period
→Write down amusing things to add to work in progress
→Make my car work best
→Begin stockpiling condoms. (Granted, I'm not going to really need 177 condoms for anything but I could still make balloon animals out of them)
→Trick a woman into falling in love with me.
→Make a mix tape that embodies in 90 minutes of song the way I feel about the transition from hot hot summer to lush, cool winter.
→Passing stuff at uni should probably be in this list too...


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It's weird, today I've felt like Summer was over and I'd been at university for weeks. This was particularly surprising considering it was 37 degrees and I didn't actually go to uni at all.
The Foxtel's working out pretty well. I get Fashion TV now. They have a show called "Models Talk" which I used to watch a lot because I thought it was called "Model Stalk"
I found a moulded piece of black plastic that's broken off something today in my room. I don't know what it's broken off of, which scares me.
This marks my 100th day straight of Journaling. Today on ESPN a commentator commented that Dallas was on a winning streak because they'd won 17 of their last 21 games. Stupid. Summer Journal 3 was 185kbs.
I think I'll go to bed now, I have to wake up at 8:45am so I can log onto the Internet, steal a good tute and prac time for programming, and then go back to sleep again. Uni starts at 2pm tommorow and at some point after I have to get into town to pick up my car. Stupid car. Stupid Britney Spears song which I like now because I keep hearing it on Fashion TV.

I got my car back today, it should be on its way to being best. I wish that Ultra Tune had turned it into a truck though, because I want to be a professional truck racer now.
In my 3 lectures today the only thing I did was try not to fall asleep in the first one and then spent the next two making an ad for 1st year uni books. I could make up to $140 bucks if I sell all three of them. I used a piece of pad paper and a pen and I wrote *SALE* and *BARGAIN* on them in big letters and put my phone number at the bottom. I also wrote that it was ok for hot women to call me. Seriously, my ad was so good, I think people who don't even need them will want to buy them.
Also, I think my lecture theatre wouldn't notice if, during the boring lecture of Software Engineering, John Edwards came in and started doing a taping of crossing over.

Weekend: Over.
One week of uni is also over. Now for week two, when all the tutorials and pracs and earlier starts and extra days begin. For example, tommorow is one of those "days" at uni. One of those days where everything I've had to do at uni but have been putting off, can be done in one day. Unfortunately it means getting there an hour earlier so I will have to be there around 2pm.
Today on Foxtel they did a "Best of Skithouse"; I missed it because I was taking a slash.
Speaking of pissing, it's going to rain down soon. It's got to. I think it's a little premature, as it's only just gone March, but I want the rains to be here. I like it when the Earth gets that whole "cold rain on warm, dry dirt" feel/smell and then the roads get all slippery because it's the first real rain in a month and then the leaves turn green and it's just lush and wet for months and months. I love winter. I mean... Autumn... Autumnish...


Like my words? Want to buy one of my books? I think you'll like this one:

If you met yourself from the future, what would you ask your future self?
What if they wont tell you anything?

Chase: A Tomorrow Technologies Novella. Available Now for Less than a dollar!


This morning Angry Beavers was hilarious. Maybe because it was 5:20am, but when Norb was looking at his underwear and Dagget saw that it said "Wednesday" on it and Dagget said "That's funny, mine say 'October'" it was hilarious.
I have to stop watching Angry Beavers, it's completely fucking up my sleeping pattern.
Did you know you get $500 dollars *just* for sending in a video to Australia's Funniest Home Videos? FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS! If I sent one video in a fortnight, hell, I could stop working. If you win the week, you get ten thousand dollars. This is an UNTAPPED GOLDMINE. I now have a new calling.

What a lame day. After I managed to get my car started I got to uni 10 minutes late. Unfortunately when I arrived there I realised I didn't actually know what I was there for. I discovered I had a programming tute and went to PHY007 like the website said I should to catch the last 40 minutes. However, after my search did turn up PHY007 it was actually some Janitors office and so I spent another 20 minutes trying to find PHY007 and then gave up and went to my databases tute at 12:00pm and got there early and was pleased that I'd managed to get to a tute on time for the first time this semester. After sitting there in the room alone for 5 minutes I remembered that we don't have database tutes until next week and that left me with two hours to kill until my next lecture, and essentially meant that I'd woken up 3 hours earlier than I needed too. So, I went to Marion and bought a printer and killed an hour there. I came back and talked to Baker and he said that the programming thing *was* in PHY007 but when he showed me where it was it was PHY0007! What bullshit! Then, after two boring COMP lectures we decided not to stick around for software engineering and so I didn't go to the prog tute repeat either and got home at 4:00.
In the end my long day was only two hours worth of learning, and half of that was spent trying to stay awake in databases.
So, when I got home, I made a cake. IT was very hard to make but it turned out nice. Nice because it was free. I had my cake, and ate it too. Umm, lame joke. Lame day.

Man my English Workshops are painful. The one dude wont shut up and keeps bringing up inane, irrelevant points which always end with "I'm talking too much again, I'm sorry" and the workshop leader is some doddering old technophobe who I can feel free to write whatever I want about on this, the Internet, as he'll never read it because he still uses a type writer! HAHA! Guess what old man, I don't really dislike you actually!
Anyhow, some point today I decided that I really, really wanted some Sizzler. Unfortunately as far as I can tell the nearest Sizzler is in Toowoomba in Queensland which is over a day's drive away. So, I figured "Hell, if I want some sizzler that bad I'll drive there and get some next holidays."
I might even take my girlfriend... if I have one, which I probably won't. Or maybe even get a girlfriend there, if I recall correctly Sizzer was all

"Complete Salad Bar Meal:
Soup, Pasta, Salad, Fruit, Girlfriend, Dessert, Softdrink, Tea & Coffee"

So score. Could be a worthwhile weekend/dream.

Today was my longest day of uni sofar. I got there before 11am (on time, THANKS CAR!) and managed to vulture a parking spot after about six minutes of looking. From there I spent two hours doing work on the software engineering project which i'm doing presentation on. It sucks, because people think I'm not doing any work for it but as a matter of fact I am as I am project manager! PROJECT MANAGER! I'm project managing and nobody realises it because they're either blind or I'm not project managing properly. However, seeing that I was the only person I recognised from my group that bothered to attend the Software Engineering Lecture today, I'm guessing I've got project managing down pat and really the next 2.8 years of study are merely formality.
After six hours of univeristy and dropping my car of at yet another car place for more fixing, I found myself at work where I faced up for three hours after I had a Crunchie Shake for lunch. I spoiled myself, and it wasn't even that great. Letdown++.
After working home from work I was pleased to discover the cricket was on, immersed myself in that for a while before deciding to go to bed in about negative five minutes.
Tommorow is my day off, God Bless my awesome timetable. I'm going to have the hugest breakfast I've ever had. On Monday I had the hugest breakfast I'd ever had (forgot to mention it) and tommorow I'm going to try and beat that. Wish me luck.

Had my day off today, and all I really did was play some basketball and watch a lot of cricket. So, here is some content about the hijinx of work last week.
See there was the lifesize cardboard cut out of Jon Bailey in a tuxedo that was next to this front end display of sunsilk shampoo. He was wearing a tux, so when you looked at him from the corner of your eye he looked like Steve (the boss). So, on the Monday night I was moving him around and leaving him at the end of aisles so people thought Steve was watching them. After that got boring we decided to put him behind the service desk so that the checkout staff would come in the next morning and think he was alive. Well, that was fun, so the next night we decided to step it up a notch and we gave him a trolley full of stuff and put him in a checkout with some stuff on the checkout. That was very funny looking, but the checkout staff obviously didn't laugh and instead tried to hide him in the express lane after trade the next night. However we found him and that night we stuck him behind the meat window. It was such a larf, and we had such plans for Friday night. We were going to put him in a cubicle upstairs in the women's toilets. We were even going to carry up a trolley full of shopping for him to stand next to again. However we couldn't find him on friday and even though we searched and searched it appeared evident that the poor cardboard fellow had been crushed in the balepress. :(

Very little of interest occurred today. This seems to happen a lot when I don't have uni. For some reason, when I don't do anything I don't end up doing anything.

This weekend has been kind of blah. It started off well, won basketball on Saturday afternoon, Australia won the test match, parents went away, people came round, got drunk, played cards and rummikub and not a lotta else. Only problem was I knew I had to get up at 9:30am on Sunday morning to drive 20 minutes to drop my brother off at basketball training, then pick him up again at 11:30am. So by the time everyone left my house at 5:30am, It looked like my night's sleep would be pretty shitty. So, I decided to pull an all nighter. I cleaned the house, did some homework, spent 35 minutes driving Alex around, did some more sitting around/homework, drove Alex around for 35 minutes again. See, the thing is, I didn't get crazy drunk or anything last night, but I did drink a hell of a lot. I'm starting to think that when I drink at my own house I don't get as drunk as normal. I'm not sure why this would be. Perhaps it's because I'm so used to everything in the house that getting drunk here doesn't ever really involve new and exciting things so everything seems less drunky. Maybe it's because I'm responsible for what goes on in the house so I have to remain calm. Whatever the reason, I sobered up while awake today, rather than while asleep. This is a shitty procedure. I have a theory on that too. See when I'm at home, because my liquor collection is so big, I generally drink a wide range of spirits instead of just one type. For example, last night's intake was: 1 Corona, 1 Strongbow, Southern Comfort and Coke, Black Douglas and Coke, Black Douglas and Coke, Cowboy Cocksucker (irish cream + butterscotch schnapps), tequila and coke, brandy and coke (yeah, lots of spirits, not a lot of mixers. Also brandy tastes like shit and I didn't want to swill it today), glass of Cointreau, Cinzano, Frangelico, Malibu and Orange Juice. Possibly not all in the right order but that's what I drank. So now it's like 9am and I've also drunk (literally, the bottle is 2l and I filled it twice) four litres of water. Anyway, all the poison in my stomach mixed together and I felt progessively sicker and sicker. The thing was, I couldn't sleep because I had to pick up Alex so I had to endure it. I was planning to stay up until 10pm tonight and then sleep 12 hours, start early on Monday and hopefully have a normal sleeping pattern for this week, but by the time I got alex home from training I went "screw it" and slept from midday until five pm. Now my sleeping pattern's going to be screwed. I woke up feeling perfectly fine though. Which was good. I was half afraid that I'd feel sick all Sunday, finally sleep Sunday night and wake up Monday with a 24hour delayed hangover and get Punk'd by my stomach. 'Twas not the case.
Also, some little bugs flew into my Butterscotch schnapps through the slow pourer some time in the last few months. That was the crunchiest cowboy cocksucker I've ever had. Nobody broke a bone. Was a good night. Just something about being incredibly tired and sickish has made today feel really drab. Probably the doom of impending uni on Monday and Tuesday. I have an essay due in like a fortnight for English which I will be 95% bullshitting for, so that needs some attention. Still, the last three weeks have gone incredibly fucking fast, and it should be holidays in a matter of hours.

Today was a good day where bad/interesting things happened. For example, I cooked and ate the majority of a packet of frozen cocktail weiners which had a use by date of December 2003.
Also, today in the English workshop, we were discussing David (the sick looking weiner guy)'s story about secretly having Bulemia in which the character had several similar traits with David and was actually called David. So, after discussing the piece for a few minutes I naturally ask "You don't actually have Bulemia, do you David?"
Cue everyone going: :O. David sat there uncomfortably for a second until the tutour butted in and said "I'm afraid I'm going to but in here and end this discussion, we won't be asking questions like this." Everyone was shocked. I was confused. I mean, sure Bulemia's a bad thing but I was kind of worried about him, you know, for having a woman disease. I figured he'd just say "No" or laugh. I mean if you really had Bulemia and didn't want anyone to know, why would you write about it in a workshopping exercise not even worth marks? If he did, he could just lie about it and say no. What if it was a cry for help? Yet apparently you can't ask people if their stories are about something in real life, which is why my next workshop piece will be called "David, you're a fatty".
After work tonight I've spent three hours combing the parts of the group assignment from Software Engineering into one legible document that makes sense. It wasn't at all easy. I had to do a shitload of proofreading and editing such that I've practically written the whole thing myself, which I'm ok with, because that's the way I'd like it anyway. Thank God I'm doing the proofreading and editing. If someone else had done all the compiling it would have been horrible, many of the group members absolutely suck arse at English, particularly Lui Wan Kan. Shocking.

Distance from Adelaide to Brisbane: 2086km
Predicted Average Speed: 90km/h
Predicted Driving Time: 23.33hours
Estimated Mix Tape Requirments: 16 (each way)
Cost of Petrol per Tank: $40 per tank
Distance travelled per tank (approx): 500km per tank
Cost of petrol for trip (approx total): $330
Cost of just flying there and not driving: I dunno, like $90 bucks with one of those cheapo deals.
Chance of driving, not flying: High

Estimated Week of Trip: Week of July 5th, 2004

This gives me enough time to win funniest home videos and find/kidnap a girlfriend for companionship. Will get there, eat Sizzler, catch up with cousins, watch Bulldogs, eat more sizzler, drive home.

I'm not positive, but it's possible that my time table is so good that it's irreputably the spawn of the dark lord Satan. I mean, just yesterday the weekend was over, and now after tommorow afternoon it will be the weekend again. SERIOUSLY, weeks now only have about nineteen minutes in them, which makes doing assignments and stuff difficult.
Tommorow I will probably drink an ice coffee again.

I think the enthusiasm for learning is on a downward spiral. I got to uni today at 10:50, got a reasonable car park and got to the programming prac where I stayed until the end despite the last ten minutes being used to discuss the first stage of a prac which I'd already done. After that I went first to the library to find books on my english topic, then to the IST building to work on programming and databases. I made progress in both. An hour later, towards the end of the databases prac I started losing interest in trying. Sat through databses lecture with my iced coffee, considering going to programming, decided to go home, missed software engineering. It's the weekend now, again. Played footy for an hour in the evening. Got hit in the balls real, real good. Unfortunately didn't get it on tape, so there's $500 down the drain. Sigh...
To make up for that, tommorow I'm digging all afternoon and filling all night. Oh yeah?

Ah, the night we wait all year for, the end of daylight savings and one extra hour of sleep. Now, when I go to bed this morning at 5:45am, it's actually 4:45am. What a sleeping I'm going to get!

I tried to get through databases today without caffeine. It was a close, well fought game, but I survived and stayed awake for the whole thing.
I also fixed my mouse. It wasn't letting me click on stuff and then I realised that there was a huge chunk of gunk that kept getting rolled by the scroll wheel which pushed it down making the mouse think I was already clicking. Scrolling is so much easier now, so smooth and rolly. Good times now, I was planning to format.
Also I had the funniest convo with willy last night, about his beard, and why he's now called willy bear.

I did dig for 5.5 hours today, then nightfilled. It was tiring work, but at some point in between I went to the Belair Hotel and had dinner. They have shitty food there, but nice mousse.