I think I just did the stupidest thing I've ever done
February 29 2004

It was Sunday night and I was just about to go out for a while. Before I go out, I like to pee to save having to do it at some other place that might be awkward.

My toilet is a very small, cubicle like room which contains only the toilet itself and a window behind it. I?d just walked in and shut the door when I saw the hugest moth I have ever laid eyes on. It had a wing span of around five inches. It was clinging to the flywire on the window. Now, I?m 19 years old, in my second year of university and I like to think of myself as kinda mature, but I?m also a guy and there was part of me that went ?Woah, a huge moth, I should pee on it?.

The next five to six minutes were spent dancing around the small cell of a toilet trying to knock the moth into the toilet bowl. I didn?t really want to touch it so I was trying to smack it into the bowl with the back of my hand. This wasn?t very successful, however, I did make contact with the moth a few times which weakened it. From there it was just a matter of time before I could just pick it up with a piece of toilet paper and throw it into the toilet. I closed the lid and flushed it slightly hoping it would drown.

I lifted up the lid and peered inside. The moth lay in the water on its back, dead still. Satisfied, I unzipped and began urinating on it. For a few seconds everything was ok? but then it started twitching.
?Oh shit? I murmured, but kept pissing. The moth then somehow flipped itself over and flew out and sat on the rim of the toilet, drenched in urine. We stared each other down for a moment while I hastily tried to finish my business. However before I was done the moth launched at me, hitting the arm of my jacket before fluttering around madly in the cramped little room. I freaked out and did my best to keep my stream in the bowl as the rest of my body jolted spastically trying to avoid the flying urine missile.

As quickly as it had begun, it stopped. The moth disappeared. I shook, zipped up and tried to look for the moth. I couldn?t see it anywhere. I shook my jacket in case it was somewhere on my body but it wasn?t. I looked all around the room but nothing. The eye of the storm. Suddenly, from out of nowhere it slammed straight into my chest, leaving a damp, moth-dust mark on my shirt. I screamed like a girl and waved my arms around. I managed to catch the moth as it rested on the wall and I threw it back into the toilet, closed the lid and flushed and flushed. I thought it was over. I used toilet paper to wipe up all that brown shit that moths make when they get touched off the walls and roof of the toilet. I was just about to chuck the paper into the toilet when I heard it? a pitter-pattering? the moth was still alive, unflushed and was flapping madly against the lid. I flushed it again, but to no avail. So, I took a deep breath, chucked the toilet paper in quickly and then held down flush for as long as I could. Silence... then the fluttering restarted, the moth would not die.

So, I shrugged, left the lid down and walked away to go out for the night. Overall I?d been in the toilet for around twenty minutes. I came home six hours later and the moth was gone. I didn?t know what had happened to it until Mum asked me if I had trapped a moth in the toilet before I went out. She was pretty upset about it. I understood why when I remembered women sit down to pee?

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